Civil & Professional Communication



The Concept of Mutual Understanding in Communication

Definition of Mutual Understanding

  • Mutual understanding means recognizing how someone else feels.

  • It involves understanding their problems, challenges, and what they want from their role (like being a teacher or a student).

Request vs. Demand
The Dinner Scenarios

  • Scenario 1 (The Demand):

    • A friend says you must pay for their meal because that's what friends do.

    • This is disrespectful and makes it less likely that the other person will want to help you again.

  • Scenario 2 (The Request):

    • A friend asks you if you could help cover their meal because they don't have enough money this month.

    • They say they understand if you can't, which shows respect and is a proper request.

The Impact of Requesting

  • People are more inclined to agree to a respectful request because it shows you recognize their right to say no.

Core Principles for Making Professional Requests to Instructors

Appreciation

  • Always start your request by thanking the instructor for their time.

Clarity and Comprehension

  • Explain "the why" behind your request so the instructor understands your situation.

  • Provide all the necessary details to avoid confusion.

  • Be specific and concise. Avoid long-winded explanations.

Professionalism

  • Use polite and professional language.

  • Avoid slang and informal greetings like "Hey."

Understanding Roles and Expectations

  • Recognize that you have agreed to deadlines and assignment requirements.

  • Remember that instructors are not obligated to give you more than what was agreed upon.

Humility

  • Treat everyone as equals, including classmates and instructors.

  • Accept that requests may be denied without assuming you deserve an exception.

Empowerment

  • Use effective communication tools to express your needs rather than begging.

Strategies for Responding to a "No"

Collaboration Over Force

  • When you hear "no" from an instructor, aim to work together instead of being forceful.

  • Think of it as working on a problem together instead of fighting for what you want.

The Intent of Instructors

  • Instructors want to help students succeed.

  • A "no" is usually a boundary, not a rejection of you as a person.

The Role of Curiosity

  • Ask about the reasons behind a "no" genuinely.

  • Use kind wording like, "I'm curious. Can you explain why?" instead of sounding confrontational.

Counterintuitive Openness

  • Even if scared of outcomes, keeping an open and appreciative attitude can help improve future requests.

Clinical Case Study: Transforming Demands into Requests (Patient Ambulation)

Context

  • A student must help a patient walk every day, which is called ambulating.

The Ineffective Approach (Demand)

  • Telling a patient, "You need to get up and walk" feels like a command, making the patient more likely to say no.

The Effective Approach (Request)

  • Saying, "Hello, Mr. Baker. Your doctor wants you to help with your recovery by walking with me. Would you like to walk down the hall?" connects the walk to their health.

Handling the Patient's "No"

  • If the patient declines, respond with, "Thank you for being honest."

  • Ask, "Can you tell me why you don't want to walk?" which shows you care and opens a dialogue.

Templates for Common Classroom Requests

Requesting an Extension for a Due Date

  • Structure:

    • Formal address: Use the right title and name for your instructor.

    • State the class and assignment number.

    • Explain your reasons for needing more time.

    • Suggest talking about how to complete the work if the extension can't be granted.

    • Thank them with your name at the end.

Requesting Assistance with Difficult Concepts

  • Benefits of Reaching Out:

    • Helps you overcome hesitation and helps you understand better.

    • Boosts your motivation and invites new ideas.

  • Template Elements:

    • Name the textbook, specific pages or skills you need help with.

    • Mention any upcoming quizzes or tests.

    • Show you understand they have limited time: "If you're busy, any advice would be appreciated."

Requesting Clarification on Missed Points

  • Philosophy:

    • See feedback as a chance to learn and grow.

  • Template Elements:

    • Specify the class and assignment or quiz.

    • State how many points you missed and on which question.

    • Ask if the instructor has time to explain how you can improve.

  • Verbal Clarification:

    • Ask questions right after class if needed, and always thank the instructor.


TED Talk


  1. Introduction to the Story

    • Time: 2 a.m.

    • Situation: Pediatric alert goes off.

    • Arrival of medical professionals: Intensive care registrar and pediatric registrar arrive together.

  2. The Emergency Situation

    • Patient: Four-year-old girl, acutely short of breath.

    • Initial actions: Nurses set up monitoring, doctors examine the girl and talk to her mother.

    • Discussion among doctors: Passionate conversation about next steps, which becomes heated.

  3. Decision-Making Process

    • Chosen action: Maximum drug therapy instead of assisted breathing.

    • Next steps: Intensive care doctor leaves while pediatric doctor tries to get intravenous access.

  4. Nurses and Medication

    • Nurses ask for guidance on the next medication (Aminophylline).

    • Doctor responds dismissively.

    • Nurses look up information and return after 10 minutes.

    • Repeated inquiry about medication rate leads to doctor's frustration.

  5. Administration of Drug

    • Nurses connect the drug to the patient after getting the prescription.

    • Overdose scenario: Patient receives 15 to 20 hours' worth of a toxic dose of aminophylline.

  6. Aftermath of the Incident

    • Patient's condition improves after a rocky start.

    • An incident form is created, prompting an investigation.

  7. Investigation Findings

    • Nurses found to lack competence and need retraining.

    • Communication problems highlighted.

  8. Realization About Healthcare Teams

    • Speaker's experience over 10 years in emergency medicine and safety lead roles.

    • Importance of processes vs. people: Process is important but practice involves complex human interactions.

  9. Importance of Civility in Teams

    • Research by Riskin and Erez in 2015 showcased how rudeness affects team performance.

    • Mild rudeness leads to 40-60% variance in patient care quality.

  10. Effects of Rudeness

    • Personal effects of rudeness on staff: Feeling belittled, ashamed, and powerless.

    • Redistribution of focus and reduced performance: 61% bandwidth reduction after experiencing rudeness.

  11. Impact on Onlookers

    • Observers in the emergency department feeling the pressure to avoid conflict.

    • Rudeness decreases their willingness to help others by up to 50%.

  12. Change Over Time

    • Historical perspective on healthcare practices, e.g., smoking in hospitals in the past.

    • Current understanding of civility's impact can lead to better team performance.

  13. Conclusion

    • Importance of choosing respectful behavior to support team dynamics in healthcare.

    • Civility can literally save lives and enhance teamwork effectiveness in all professions.

  14. Closing Remarks

    • Thank you to the audience for their attention.