Notes on The Morality of Human Sexuality
Anthropological Dimension and the Morality of Sex
Chapter focus: The morality of human sexuality; sexuality as a core part of being human, with culturally patterned attitudes influencing moral discussions.
Filipino context: sex often viewed as taboo; premarital and extramarital sex are culturally resisted but privately practiced.
Goal of the notes: provide a comprehensive, organized summary of concepts, definitions, examples, and ethical implications from the transcript.
The Anthropological Dimension of Man and Woman
Purpose: Understand the human person through the body to grasp the social and moral functions of sex.
Equality and difference:
Man and woman are created as equals in their core humanity, but differ in reproductive organs.
External male organs vs internal female organs reflect different tendencies and social roles.
Key reference: Kahayon & Aquino (1985, p. 386).
Reproductive anatomy:
Male body: external reproductive organs (testes, penis).
Female body: internal reproductive organs (ovaries, womb, vagina).
Implications of differences:
Externality of male organs suggested more external orientation toward the world.
Internality of female organs suggested greater focus on family.
Behavioral tendencies linked to anatomy:
Arousal: males tend to be easily aroused due to tumescence (penis stiffening and pointing outward).
Female arousal tends to be slower and more relationally grounded.
Communication styles: males favor verbal, broad-world topics; females emphasize intimate, relational communication.
Social dynamics: males may be more action- and adventure-oriented; females may seek security and deeper relationships.
Stimuli and arousal:
Males: strongest sexual stimuli are visual; can tolerate distance.
Females: strongest sexual stimuli are tactile; sense of nearness drives arousal.
Romantic and sexual progression:
Males may be more superficial in initial attraction; may explore a partner's body and seek new partners after novelty wears off.
Females may seek depth and security, making them less easily aroused by mere visual cues.
Orgasm directionality:
Males: outward, with expulsion of semen/seed (external ejection).
Females: inward direction with absorption; longer-lasting arousal can lead to more enduring relational implications.
Communication of affection:
Males: affection often expressed verbally; trust through words.
Females: affection expressed through non-verbal intimacy and actions; emphasis on relational closeness.
Social implications for relationship maintenance:
Differences in arousal, communication, and needs require mutual understanding and filling each other’s weaknesses with strengths.
The Nature and Purpose of Sexual Love
Sexual love as the deepest expression of the whole person: body, emotions, and spirit.
Not just for personal pleasure; pleasure is a byproduct of a divinely ordered purpose:
The sex instinct parallels self-preservation and nourishment of the body; God attaches pleasure to sex to fulfill life-propagation goals.
Core purposes (Natural Law Ethics):
Conjugal union (marital fidelity) and procreation are the innate purposes of sexual love.
Love should be expressed in physical, emotional, and spiritual unity with a partner; the union should bear fruit (children) and fulfill the partners.
Sexual love as a social good:
Creates a community and an atmosphere of gratitude, generosity, and joy.
In intersubjectivity, individuals realize they are incomplete apart from the beloved; the presence of the other completes the self.
Sexual love as an appeal to the other:
To understand life more deeply, a person must move beyond egoism and trust another.
Love involves risk: opening oneself to another, trusting, and giving oneself fully.
Trust entails mutual care and protection; deception undermines both partners.
Mutual self-fulfillment:
True sexual love seeks fulfillment in the beloved’s fulfillment, not by dividing it, but by identifiably sharing in each other’s joy.
It is a total gift of self, a giving of the best, with trust as a central axis.
The paradox of union and individuality:
In sexual love, two persons become one and remain two at the same time: I am-you-and-you-are-me.
Marriage as a spiritual metaphor:
Quotation from Kahlil Gibran (The Prophet): marriage should allow space between partners, like a moving sea between shores; avoid co-dependence; stand together but not too near.
Ethical implications:
Authentic love uses personal freedom to seek the good of the beloved; love without mutual self-fulfillment leads to emptiness.
The language of sexuality becomes the deepest form of human communication when it is mutual, open, and reverent.
The Discontented Love
Problem of self-centered love:
Love focused on satisfying sexual desires alone leads to dissatisfaction and emptiness for both partners.
Selfish sexual pursuit harms the ability to make the other happy and to achieve personal fulfillment.
Thomas Merton reference:
Quote: "The man who loves himself too much is incapable of loving anyone effectively" (paraphrased from Merton, 1967, p. 24).
Authentic sexual love and mutual fulfillment:
True fulfillment arises not from dividing happiness but by identifying with the beloved’s fulfillment as one’s own.
Dividing fulfillment diminishes love; mutual fulfillment is free and not coercive (no abduction, rape, seduction, kidnapping, or coercion).
Long-term relationship implications:
One-night stands or casual sexual encounters fail to provide lasting happiness and deepen emotional distance.
Sexual Love and the Dignity of Women
Historical patterns of gender disdain and dignity:
Various cultures and religious traditions historically assigned lesser dignity to women.
Examples cited: reincarnation beliefs in Indian and Persian/Islamic contexts; Plato’s view of women as closer to matter; some religious perspectives denied women souls or heaven-oriented status.
Christian perspective on equal dignity:
St. Ambrose: both men and women bear God’s image; equality in dignity.
Hugh of St. Victor: woman taken from the side of man implies equality, not superiority or inferiority.
Genesis 2:23: Eve as "bone of my bone, and flesh of my flesh" used to illustrate equality and partnership.
Mary as the vocation of women: motherhood as a central Christian vocation, not merely sexual objectification.
Contemporary pastoral implications:
The Church should recognize the dignity and rights of homosexual individuals while not officially endorsing homosexual relations.
John Rawls’ principle of inviolable dignity: everyone is a child of God by grace; pastoral care involves acceptance and truth-telling, with an emphasis on equality and respect for all.
The Discipline on Sex
Sex as a power that must be rightly channeled:
Without discipline, sex can become a source of servitude, frustration, egotism, and destruction.
Freedom and responsibility:
Freedom to engage in sex carries responsibility; moral discipline creates restraint and directs liberty.
Against libertine notions of sexuality:
Opposes unlimited, unfettered sexual license (
Mill quote: "it is better to be a human being dissatisfied than a pig satisfied; better to be Socrates dissatisfied than a fool satisfied" (Mill, as cited in Hakim))
Respect for human dignity and dignity of the other:
If sexuality degrades another person, it defeats the humanizing role of sex.
Freedom and commitment:
True freedom in sexuality is openness to the other, resulting in commitment, care, and responsibility for the beloved’s welfare and growth.
Sexual responsibility and justice:
Love is inseparable from justice; exploitation and subjugation undermine genuine love.
Respect requires freedom and absence of exploitation; it is essential to uphold the beloved’s dignity.
Sex: Humanizing or Dehumanizing
Two possible trajectories:
Humanizing: sex enables self-realization and fulfillment of the beloved; creates a WE that embodies fullness and happiness.
Dehumanizing: sex degrades the other by using them as a means to an end; the other becomes an IT, objectified and disposable.
Virtues to preserve humanity in sex:
Temperance: moderates appetites, touch, and taste; necessary because freedom is not absolute.
Modesty: moderates movements and appearances within the limits of life stage, capacity, and wealth; linked to chastity.
Chastity: modulates desire in accordance with right reason (recta ratio).
Filipino cultural context:
Public displays of affection are often taboo; modesty and chastity are emphasized to prevent degradation of dignity.
Public PDA considered inappropriate if it arouses others sexually.
Types of Sexual Deviation (Sexual Paresthesia) and Related Behaviors
Definition: deviations, perversions, or aberrations considered immoral in many social contexts; classifications depend on norms and psychological factors.
Homosexuality:
Refers to sexual relations between individuals of the same sex; also called homoeroticism (with female versions: lesbianism/pederasty in some contexts).
Definitions vary; some see it as innate, others as psycho-socially acquired.
Goethe’s view: homosexuality is ancient and natural in some historical contexts but not procreative or unitive in a way that aligns with marriage.
Moral stance (in transcript): not inherently immoral if not acting on it; pastoral care emphasizes dignity and rights, equality, and support; conversion or acceptance within faith communities is discussed.
Christian ethical stance: emphasize equal dignity; support for the individual while maintaining the traditional prohibition on homosexual acts; pastoral care involves recognizing the suffering and offering support.
Bestiality:
Sexual relations between humans and animals; condemned by Scripture (Exodus 22:19; Leviticus 20:15f).
Paresthesias and perversions (list includes multiple items):
Sadism: sexual gratification from cruelty toward others.
Transvestism (eonism): cross-dressing; sexual arousal tied to clothing or the opposite sex’s attire, not necessarily tied to homosexuality.
Masochism: gratification from pain or humiliation.
Necrophilia: attraction to corpses; sexual acts with the dead.
Frotteurism: rubbing against strangers to obtain sexual arousal without consent.
Exhibitionism: arousal from public exposure of one’s body.
Fetishism: arousal from specific objects or parts of the body (e.g., underwear, stockings, etc.).
Pygmalionism: arousal from statues, often statues of nude women.
Pedophilia: sexual attraction to children; etymology from Greek paedos (child) and philein (to love); historically connected to pederasty and anal-genital practices.
Gerontophilia: attraction to older people; can involve older men or women.
Mixoscopia/Voyeurism: peeping tom behavior; arousal from viewing others in intimate situations; voyeurism is defined and linked to sexual inhibition.
Ethical stance on deviations:
Deviations are morally problematic; roots can be psychological or guilt-based; personal guilt should be managed and not allowed to excuse harm.
Distinguishes between moral condemnation and pastoral care; individuals with deviations deserve dialogue, care, and support while maintaining ethical boundaries.
Pornography and Prostitution
Definitions:
Pornography: originally meaning written prostitution; now includes obscene or pornographic literature or visuals intended to arouse.
Prostitution: the sale of sexual services for money or other compensation; historically female-dominated, now includes male and child prostitution.
Moral analysis:
Arousal to porn is common and not per se deviant, but compulsive pornography use can be a deviation if it substitutes normal sexual relations.
Pornography and prostitution dehumanize by treating people as commodities; this violates Kantian ethics of treating persons as ends in themselves.
Art vs pornography:
Some nudity in art may be non-arousing; arousal signals pornographic intent, which is morally problematic in the context of exploitation.
Social critique:
Pornography commercializes sex, reducing people to marketable goods; prostitution mirrors and reinforces this commodification.
Ethical implications:
Exploitation, coercion, and lack of consent are central concerns; respect for persons requires refraining from treating others as means to pleasure.
Practical tensions:
Some utilitarian or pragmatic perspectives may suggest prostitution as a poverty alleviation strategy, but this is weighed against dignity and exploitation concerns.
Growth in Human Love and Expressions of Intimacy
Importance of growth in love:
Growth prevents infidelity, broken marriages, and extreme outcomes like suicide.
Incompatibility and superficiality are cited as psychological factors hindering growth.
Necking and petting as intimacy:
Necking and petting are discussed as foreplay that can be morally acceptable if not leading to arousal, especially within marriage.
For unmarried couples, necking and petting risk premarital sex and are often deemed immoral due to potential arousal.
Kissing may be culturally acceptable if it does not arouse; petting is generally rejected for unmarried couples because it leads to arousal.
Premarital and non-marital sex: definitions and distinctions
Non-marital sex (fornication): sexual activity without any commitment to marriage; morally unacceptable when love or commitment is missing.
Extramarital sex (adultery): sexual activity outside a marriage; morally wrong as it violates charity and justice and undermines the marriage bond.
Pre-ceremonial sex: some authors view as legitimate for building intimacy but often treated as fornication or a trial within marriage depending on context.
Premarital sex: involves intention to marry; traditionally viewed as gravely sinful in Christian ethics; often linked to lack of consummation and the concept of marriage as a covenant.
Biblical and theological framing:
Old Testament prohibitions: Exodus 20:14 (you shall not commit adultery); Exodus 20:17 (you shall not covet your neighbor's wife); stoning consequences (Deuteronomy 22:22; Leviticus 20:10; Sirach 23:18–27).
New Testament reaffirmations: Matthew 5:27–32; 1 Corinthians 6:9; Hebrews 13:4; Jesus’ teaching places fornication among sins that affect the kingdom of God.
The covenant of marriage and consummation:
Ratam et consummatum (rite and consummation) are essential for a valid marriage; marriage is a covenant often described as ratified through love and, in some traditions, a symbolic form of ultimate commitment (blood metaphor).
Premarital sex is linked to fear of discovery and pregnancy, often resulting in coitus interruptus; lack of definitive commitment undermines true love.
Practical concerns and risks:
Premarital sex carries risks of relationship instability, unequal expectations between partners, and potential emotional harm.
The proper context for sexual union is within a committed, loving, and faithful marriage.
Summary of Key Ethical Principles and References
Core purposes of sexuality:
Conjugal union and procreation within marriage; sexuality as a language of love and mutual self-fulfillment.
The WE and I-You-You-I paradox:
Sexual love fosters a sense of shared being while preserving individual dignity.
Respect, justice, and dignity:
Love is inseparable from justice; exploitation and objectification undermine authentic love.
Virtues for healthy sexuality:
Temperance, modesty, and chastity guide behavior and protect dignity.
Be mindful of cultural context:
Filipino attitudes toward modesty and public affection shape moral judgments and expectations.
Theological and philosophical anchors:
Thomas Merton on self-love and love of others; Kantian ethics on treating persons as ends; Gibran on the spirituality and poetry of love; St. Ambrose and Hugh of St. Victor on equality and partnership; the Christian vocation of women through Mary.
Quick Reference: Key Terms and Citations
Ratum et consummatum: rite and consummation of marriage.
Conjugal union: the marital act of uniting husband and wife.
Premarital sex: sexual activity before marriage; traditionally viewed as gravely sinful in Christian ethics.
Fornication: non-marital sex; lack of personal commitment to marriage.
Extramarital sex: adultery; sexual activity outside marriage.
Pornography: erotic material intended to arouse; moral concerns about exploitation and commodification.
Prostitution: selling sexual services for money; viewed as exploitation and dehumanization.
Moral authorities cited: Exodus 20:14; Exodus 20:17; Leviticus 20:10; Deuteronomy 22:22; Matthew 5:27–32; 1 Corinthians 6:9; Hebrews 13:4; Kant on treating others as ends; Kantian phrasing: "act so as to treat humanity, whether in your own person or in that of another, always at the same time as an end and never merely as a means"; Mill quote on dissatisfaction; Gibran quotes on love; St. Ambrose; Hugh of St. Victor.
Percentages on premarital activity (from necking/petting discussion): 68 ext{ extdollar} ext{ ext{%}}, 78 ext{ extdollar} ext{ ext{%}}, 95 ext{ extdollar} ext{ ext{%}}, 98 ext{ extdollar} ext{ ext{%}} indicating rising premarital activity across timeframes.