chapter 7 Talking and Listening

Chapter 7: Talking and Listening

Learning Objectives:
- Realize the importance of conversation.
- Recognize the motives and needs for interpersonal communication.
- Discern conversation habits.
Definition of Conversation:
- Judy Apps: "conversation" comes from con (with) and versare (turn); it involves alternation of turns.
- Donald Allen and Rebecca Guy: "Conversation is the primary basis of direct social relations between persons… constitutes a reciprocal and rhythmic interchange of verbal emissions."
- Susan Brennan: Conversation includes linguistic forms and nonverbal signals and is interactive, thus differentiating conversations (multiple participants) from dialogues (two participants).
Contemporary Issues:
- Concerns about the decline of face-to-face conversation due to technology.
- Sherry Turkle: Example of an 18-year-old relying on texting and expressing a desire to learn how to converse in real-time, which is an active, uncontrollable process.
- Communication is critical in personal and professional contexts; illustrated by prisoners developing codes to communicate despite restrictions.

David Angle's Approach:
- Classifies conversations based on:
- Directionality:
  - One-way: Individual communicates while the other listens passively.
  - Two-way: Mutual interaction where both parties engage.
- Tone/Purpose:
  - Cooperative: Focused on mutual contributions.
  - Competitive: Prioritizes individual perspectives.
- Four Distinct Types:
- Discourse (One-way Cooperative): Example - Professors giving lectures.
- Dialogue (Two-way Cooperative): Goal is sharing information and building relationships; example - first dates.
- Debate (Two-way Competitive): Focus on persuasion to win arguments; example - study group discussions.
- Diatribe (One-way Competitive): Focus on expressing emotion; example - venting about grades.

Key Reasons for Communication:
- Physical Needs: Alleviates symptoms of health issues (e.g., cancer, depression) through social interactions.
- Identity Needs: Influences perception of self; feedback from others helps shape self-concept.
- Social Needs: Essential for initiating, maintaining, and terminating relationships.
- Practical Needs: Necessary for information exchange and problem-solving.
Rebecca Rubin’s Communication Motives:
- Six main reasons: control, relaxation, escape, inclusion, affection, and pleasure.

Communication is vital; recognizing motives and needs improves interpersonal skills.
Categories of communication motives: control, affection, relaxation, pleasure, inclusion, escape.
Types of needs: physical, identity, social, practical.
Communication habits are challenging to modify.

Reflect on alternate communication methods if verbal conversations were not possible.
Categorize personal communication reasons based on identified motives and needs.
Roleplay introduction scenarios and analyze habitual statements.

Learning Objectives:
- Describe motives for self-disclosure.
- Appreciate the self-disclosure process.
- Explain self-disclosure consequences.
- Discuss the Johari Window model.
Self-Disclosure Defined: Sydney Jourard defines it as allowing one's true self to be known.
Factors Influencing Self-Disclosure:
- Personality, cultural background, emotional state, biological sex, psychological gender, status differentials, physical environment, and communication channel.
Motives for Self-Disclosure:
- Social Integration: Building relationships through shared experiences.
- Impression Management: Presenting oneself favorably through various techniques (self-descriptions, accounts, apologies, entitlements/enhancements, flattery, favors).

Developed by Irwin Altman and Dalmas Taylor (1973).
Describes interpersonal closeness through self-disclosure layers, akin to an onion:
- Stages include orientation, exploratory affective, affective, stable, and, optionally, depenetration.
Factors Affecting Disclosure: Personal characteristics, rewards/cost, situational context.

Introduced by Joseph Luft and Harrington Ingham to visualize interpersonal awareness:
- Open Self: Known to self and others.
- Hidden Self: Known to self, not to others.
- Blind Self: Unknown to self, known to others.
- Unknown Self: Unknown to self and others.

Self-disclosure facilitates relationship development and can have positive or negative impacts.

Create a self-penetration diagram to analyze personal sharing levels.
Reflect on experiences using impression management techniques.
Construct and fill out a personal Johari Window, incorporating feedback from peers.

Learning Objectives:
- Differentiate between hearing and listening.
- Understand effective listening strategies.
- Recognize different types of listening.
Listening Defined: Active process where attention is applied to understanding a message, contrasting passive hearing.
HURIER Model of Listening:
- Model stages: Hearing, Understanding, Remembering, Interpreting, Evaluating, Responding.
- Example: Misunderstanding due to distractions; the necessity for mindful intention in listening.

Responses Include:
- Silent Listening
- Questioning
- Types: Clarification, elaboration, discovery.
- Paraphrasing (restating speaker's message in own words).
- Empathizing (demonstrating understanding and compassion).
- Supporting (showing care).
- Analyzing (offering interpretations).
- Evaluating (appraising speaker's thoughts).
- Advising (providing suggestions wisely).

Steps: Create an accurate assessment through describing perceptions, offering interpretations, and seeking clarifications.

Types of responses vary based on context; proper utilization enhances communication.
Effective questioning can enrich conversations.

Create examples for each type of listening response and discuss their appropriateness.
Develop a chart of various questioning types and examples.
Compare perceptions from a shared media experience to analyze group dynamics.

Understanding talking and listening enhances interpersonal communication competency.
Topics included conversations, self-disclosure, and strategies for effective listening.

Conversations, Emotional Blackmail, Self-Disclosure, Johari Window, Listening Responses, Perception Checking, Social Penetration Theory.