March 27 psych class

Relationship Attachment Styles

  • Overview

    • Three different attachment styles in romantic relationships:
      1. Secure attachment
      2. Avoidant attachment
      3. Anxious attachment
    • Common method for assessing romantic relationship attachment involves self-description

  • Avoidant Attachment Style

    • Characteristic behaviors include:
      • Discomfort with closeness
      • Difficulty trusting others
      • Hesitance to depend on others
      • Tendency to feel nervous when intimacy increases
      • Impulse to withdraw when feeling overwhelmed or pressured for intimacy
    • This leads to a disparity in intimacy desires between partners

  • Social Observations

    • Many can recognize individuals displaying these extreme attachment styles
    • Most people perceive themselves as having a secure attachment style
    • The second most common is avoidant attachment
    • A significant number may display anxious attachment styles, though less frequently reported

Childhood Influence on Attachment Styles

  • Attachment styles are largely influenced by relationships with caregivers during childhood.

  • Schema Formation

    • A schema is defined as a memory structure organized around a theme; here, around romantic relationships
    • Children develop expectations based on caregiving experiences, which shape their adult relationship behaviors
    • Attachment styles may not remain static into adulthood; about 50% change from childhood to adulthood
    • Changes often occur as individuals want to avoid repeating negative experiences from childhood

  • Stranger Task

    • Method for demonstrating attachment styles in children:
      1. Caregiver is present with the child in a room with a stranger
      2. Caregiver leaves, observing child's reaction
      3. Return of the caregiver also monitored
    • Securely Attached Children
      • Upset but not overly distressed upon caregiver's departure
      • Receptive and excited upon caregiver's return
    • Anxiously Attached Children
      • Show extreme distress when caregiver leaves
      • Typically overjoyed upon return, possibly due to erratic caregiving
    • Avoidantly Attached Children
      • Display indifference when caregiver leaves or returns
      • Do not expect security or support from the caregiver

Impact of Attachment Styles on Adult Relationships

  • Secure Relationships
    • Best relationships involve two partners with secure attachments
    • Generally, these relationships last longer and exhibit higher satisfaction and commitment
    • Combinations of avoidant or anxious styles generally lead to less satisfaction
    • An exception exists where an anxious female and avoidant male can form longer-lasting relationships
    • Gender stereotypes may affect perceptions of behavior in these pairings

Social Exchange Theory

  • Overview

    • Social exchange theory analyzes relationships based on rewards and costs, as well as beliefs about alternatives
    • An economic model helps conceptualize the dynamics of romantic relationships:
      • Focused on cost-benefit ratios

  • Cost-Benefit Ratios

    • Rewards
      • Positive gratifying aspects that reinforce the relationship; can include:
      • Partner's personality traits
      • External benefits such as status, money, or social access
    • Costs
      • Negative aspects or characteristics that must be tolerated; can include irritating habits or personality traits

  • Terms to Know

    • Relationship Satisfaction
      • Concept of satisfaction based on comparison levels
      • Determined by:
      • Current cost-benefit ratio
      • Comparison level (expectations regarding benefits vs. costs)
    • Comparison Level (CL)
      • The standard against which one judges the satisfaction from a relationship; expectations based on past experiences
    • Comparison Level of Alternatives (CLalt)
      • Beliefs about the availability of better relationship options; influences commitment levels
    • Investment
      • Resources put into a relationship that cannot be recovered if the relationship ends
      • Examples: time, emotional energy, money

  • Commitment Dynamics

    • Satisfaction, investment, and comparison levels all affect commitment:
      • Higher satisfaction leads to a greater intention to stay in the relationship
      • More investment increases the likelihood of commitment
      • Lower comparison levels of alternatives lead to greater commitment

Process of Relationship Dissolution

  • Following dissatisfaction, individuals may experience a sequence of phases before ending a relationship:
    • Intrapersonal Phase
      • Self-assessment of partner’s behavior
      • Evaluation of costs and benefits of the relationship
    • Dyadic Phase
      • Discussions about relationship issues; addressing negative feelings
      • Attempting to negotiate and reconcile
    • Social Phase
      • Engage friends and family; discussing relationship dynamics with others
      • Create narratives around the breakup; may involve gossiping
    • Final Phase
      • Actual end of the relationship
      • Self-reflection; considerations of future relationships

Exchange vs. Communal Relationships

  • Exchange Relationships

    • Focused on equity and immediate reciprocation for favors
    • Expectation of equal contribution and quick returns

  • Communal Relationships

    • More concerned with meeting the needs of others
    • Less focused on the tit-for-tat mentality typically seen in exchange relationships

  • Distinctions influence how individuals manage relationships, and the type of relationship can affect overall satisfaction and commitment.

Conclusion

  • Understanding these attachment styles and theories can illuminate relational dynamics and guide individuals toward healthier relationships.
  • Recognizing one’s own attachment style may improve relational outcomes by prompting self-awareness and promoting effective communication among partners.

Closing Thoughts

  • Emphasizing the importance of communication surrounding relationship issues, emotional needs, and personal expectations, can foster better relational environments.
  • Reflecting on personal relationships and their potential for improvement can lead to more fulfilling relational experiences.