W8 Davidson: EXPRESSING EMOTION IN INTERPERSONAL INTERACTIONS

Introduction to Expressing Emotion in Interpersonal Interactions

  • Prepared by Associate Professor Martin N. Davidson as a basis for class discussion.

  • Copyright © 2001 by the University of Virginia Darden School Foundation.

  • All rights reserved—no reproduction without permission.

The Nature of Emotions in Communication

  • Emotions are omnipresent in interaction, affecting every dialogue regardless of topic or participants.

  • Non-verbal cues convey emotions:

    • Tone of voice changes

    • Speech tempo variations (faster or slower)

    • Hand gestures

    • Physiological changes (e.g., blushing)

Emotional Expression and Influence

  • Argument exists regarding emotional control:

    • Some assert controlling emotions can enhance influence and convey rational communication.

    • Suppressing emotions may yield three significant effects:

    1. People learn to internally suppress emotions without needing external support.

    2. Individuals may become unaware of their emotions, leading to difficulty identifying them.

    3. There is a lack of learning about emotional management, both self and of others.

Costs of Emotional Suppression

  • Emotional suppression can lead to:

    • Internal physical and psychological stress

    • Withdrawal from participating in interactions

    • Energy loss and depression (especially if anger is internalized)

    • Decreased learning and attention to tasks

    • Emotional issues festering and hindering proper action

    • Loss of influential opportunities due to lack of emotional engagement

    • Reduced affirmation of others leading to undermined motivation

    • Weakened capacity to receive critical feedback or negative affects.

Benefits of Skillful Emotional Expression

  • Expressive communication of emotions enhances understanding and commitment:

    • Ideas presented with emotional weight increase clarity and perceived credibility.

    • The Johari Window model indicates that enhancing public self-awareness is vital for interpersonal competence.

Guidelines for Appropriate Emotional Expression

  • Uninhibited emotional expression may not always be suitable:

    • Example: A colleague's inquiry, "How are you this morning?" should not prompt a detailed emotional essay on various stressors.

Factors in Managing Emotion Skillfully

Timing

  • Ideal timing for expressing emotions is after the experience generating them, as emotional distractions can hinder productivity.

  • Notable moments include;

    • Lulls in conversations or at the end of meetings when team members are finishing activities.

    • Observations of members displaying strong emotions signal potential need for emotional acknowledgment.

Context

  • Team environment generally provides the best forum for emotional expression.

  • If a team is unprepared for emotional discussion, utilize legitimizing statements like:

    • “I know we haven’t talked about this in the group, but when the idea came up, I got pretty upset.”

  • Post-meeting discussions can also be effective for expressing emotions in response to prior events.

  • Alternatives include informal chats with trusted team members assessing reactions.

  • Be wary of involving uninvolved parties as it can politicize dynamics and create factions within the team.

Extent

  • Emotional expression can be viewed as a continuum rather than a binary choice (all or nothing):

    • Complete silence or no expression at all is sometimes appropriate.

    • On one end of the continuum, feelings may be expressed in abstract terms (e.g., “I am angry with you”), but this may lack conviction without accompanying cues.

    • Mid-range expression includes some nonverbal cues, enhancing credibility (e.g., tense facial muscles, direct eye contact).

    • The far end includes expressive, spontaneous displays of emotion with verbal and nonverbal components.

Skill Options for Emotion Expression

  • A simple heuristic for emotional expression: "I feel X," where "X" can include:

    • Pleasure

    • Sadness

    • Gladness

    • Satisfaction

    • Pride

    • Boredom

    • Joy

    • Frustration

    • Jubilation

    • Remorse

    • Confidence

    • Fear

    • Disgust

    • Daring

    • Helplessness

    • Depression

    • Jealousy

    • Happiness

    • Inspiration

    • Excitement

    • Repulsion

    • Loneliness

    • Hope

    • Love

    • Elation

    • Gratitude

    • Apathy

    • Silliness

    • Incompetence

    • Hesitation

    • Solemnity

    • Guilt

    • Surprise

    • Envy

    • Grief

    • Hopelessness

    • Eagerness

    • Hate

    • Exasperation

    • Weariness

    • Spite

    • Anger

    • Anxiety

    • Overwhelmed

    • Rejection

Conclusion on Managing Emotional Expression

  • Managing emotional expression yields significant benefits:

    • Creates internal comfort and reduces psychological stress.

    • Enhances the stability and closeness of work relationships through clearer communication and genuine interactions.

    • Increases overall effectiveness in work groups and teams, fostering higher performance and diminishing issues like withdrawal, boredom, and frustration.