Article

Introduction to Parenting

• Parenting is about being the best mom or dad for our kids.

• There is no straightforward manual for raising children.

• Love and support for children is unconditional.

Ryland's Story

• Jeff and Hillary Whittington wanted to be parents; they had a daughter named Ryland.

• Ryland was diagnosed with deafness on her first birthday.

• Ryland received cochlear implants and began to communicate.

• As soon as Ryland could speak, she claimed, "I am a boy."

Initial Reactions

• Parents felt sad about the challenges Ryland would face but recognized Ryland's identity.

• Some dismissed Ryland's feelings as a "phase"; however, the feelings grew stronger.

• It was important for Ryland to express his true self.

The Impact of Shame

• Ryland experienced increasing shame about his identity.

• Shame can develop from societal messages about being different.

• Psychotherapist Ami B. Kaplan emphasizes how destructive shame can be.

• Ryland questioned his identity and future, stating, "When the family dies, I will cut my hair so I can be a boy."

Acceptance and Understanding

• Ryland's parents listened, learned, and reached out for help.

• They concluded that Ryland is transgender (born with female anatomy but identifies as male).

• Acceptance of Ryland’s identity was vital for his mental health.

Mental Health Statistics

• 41% of transgender individuals have attempted suicide due to lack of acceptance.

• Strong family ties can significantly reduce suicide attempts among transgender individuals.

• Support is crucial for living authentically.

Transition and Support

• Ryland began living as a boy with parental support.

• His parents cut his hair and used the correct pronouns (him/he).

The Role of Parents

• Parenting involves loving and supporting children for who they are, not who parents want them to be.

• Despite challenges, Ryland is now happy living as his true self.

• Ryland's overall health and happiness underscore the importance of acceptance in parenting.