Interpersonal Communication: Communication and the Self - Impression Management and Disclosure

Public and Private Selves

Perceived Self: This refers to the person you genuinely believe yourself to be based on honest self-examination.
Presenting Self: This is the way you wish to appear to others, essentially your public image.
- Face: Represents the socially approved identity that an individual attempts to present in a given situation.
- Facework: Encompasses all the verbal and nonverbal communication strategies used to maintain one's presenting image or face.

Characteristics of Impression Management

We Strive to Construct Multiple Identities: Individuals adapt their presenting self depending on the context and the people they are interacting with.
Identity Management is Collaborative: Impression management is not solely an individual act; it involves interaction and agreement (explicit or implicit) with others to maintain a shared understanding of identities.
Identity Management Can Be Deliberate or Unconscious: Sometimes we consciously strategize how to present ourselves, while other times, our presentation of self is a natural, unthinking response.
People Differ in Their Degree of Identity Management: Not everyone engages in impression management to the same extent; some individuals are more adept or more focused on controlling their public image than others.

Why and How of Impression Management

It is inherently challenging not to create some kind of impression on others; most people desire a degree of control over how they are perceived.
Face-to-Face Identity Management: This is achieved through:
- Manner: The speaker's words and nonverbal actions.
- Appearance: Personal grooming, clothing, and other elements of physical presentation.
- Setting: The physical items we use to influence how others view us (e.g., decorations in a home or office).
Identity Management in Mediated Communication: While mediated communication may limit nonverbal cues, it offers unique opportunities for identity management:
- It can change interactions for individuals with verbal disabilities, providing an alternative means of expression.
- It allows for the editing and refining of ideas before communication is sent, offering more control over the message.
Identity Management and Honesty: Extreme manipulation or distortion of one's public image is considered dishonest, but most people manage the amount of information they reveal based on the specific context and relationship, which is generally accepted as part of social interaction.

Disclosing the Self

To be considered true self-disclosure, information:

Must be purposefully communicated to another person.
Needs to be honest: true, accurate, and complete.
Should have depth: meaning it is intimate and personal, not superficial information.
Involves the availability of information: the disclosed information must not be easily attainable from other sources.
Is influenced by the context of sharing: the environment and circumstances in which the disclosure occurs.

Definition of Self-Disclosure

Self-disclosure specifically:

Has self as subject (is about the speaker).
Is intentional.
Is directed at another person.
Is honest.
Is revealing (provides new information about the discloser).
Contains information generally unavailable from other sources.
Gains much of its intimate nature from the context and culture in which it is expressed.

Models of Self-Disclosure: Social Penetration Model

This model describes relationships in terms of:

Breadth: The range of subjects or topics being discussed between individuals.
Depth: The shift from unrevealing to increasingly personal messages, moving through layers of information:
- Clichés: Superficial, ritualistic exchanges (e.g., "How are you?").
- Facts: Non-intimate, factual information.
- Opinions: Personal thoughts or beliefs on various subjects.
- Feelings: Revealing deeper emotions and vulnerabilities, marking the most intimate level of self-disclosure.

Models of Self-Disclosure: The Johari Window

Developed by Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham, this model is a tool for self-assessment through feedback and disclosure, aiming to improve self-awareness and personal development. It categorizes information about a person into four areas:

Open Area (Known to self, Known to others): Information about yourself that both you and others are aware of. This area expands with self-disclosure and feedback.
Blind Area (Unknown to self, Known to others): Information about you that others are aware of but you are not. Feedback from others can help reduce this area.
Hidden Area (Known to self, Unknown to others): Information you know about yourself but choose not to reveal to others. Self-disclosure reduces this area.
Unknown Area (Unknown to self, Unknown to others): Information about yourself that neither you nor others are aware of. Over time, through life experiences and self-reflection, parts of this area may become known.

Benefits of Self-Disclosure

Self-disclosure offers several advantages:

Catharsis: A release of emotional tension by openly expressing thoughts or feelings.
Self-clarification: Articulating thoughts and feelings to better understand them.
Self-validation: Disclosing information to confirm one's self-concept or gain acceptance.
Reciprocity: The tendency for others to match the level of intimacy in disclosure.
Impression formation: Strategically disclosing information to create a desired image.
Maintenance and enhancement of relationships: Deepening bonds and trust through mutual sharing.
Moral obligation: Feeling a duty to disclose certain information in specific situations.
Social influence: Using disclosure to persuade or influence others.
Self-defense: Revealing information to protect oneself or one's interests.

Risks of Self-Disclosure

Despite the benefits, self-disclosure carries potential risks:

Rejection: Fear that others will disapprove or distance themselves upon disclosure.
Negative impression: Creating an unfavorable image in the eyes of others.
Decrease in relational satisfaction: Disclosure leading to conflict or reduced contentment in a relationship.
Loss of influence: Revealing vulnerabilities might diminish one's perceived power or control.
Loss of control: Giving others information that they might misuse or disclose further.
Hurt the other person: Disclosures that are painful or damaging to the receiver.
Increased awareness: Gaining new, potentially uncomfortable insights about oneself or the relationship after disclosure or feedback.

Alternatives to Self-Disclosure

When direct self-disclosure is not desired or appropriate, several alternatives exist:

Silence and Secrecy:
- Secrets: Involve intentionally concealing information considered too risky or personal to reveal.
- Silence: May not be overtly secretive but still involves withholding information.
Lying: A deliberate attempt to hide or misrepresent the truth.
- Benevolent lie: A lie not considered malicious by the person telling it, often told to avoid hurting another person's feelings or to benefit them in some way.
Equivocation: Not outright lying, but rather avoiding unpleasant truths through the use of ambiguous or vague language.
- Equivocal language: Has two or more equally plausible meanings.
- Example Options for Equivocation (re: a painting one dislikes but receives as a gift):
  - Option I (Equivocal, True Message): "What an unusual painting! I've never seen anything like it!" (Ambiguous but factual comment.)
  - Option II (Equivocal, False Message): "Thanks for the painting. I'll hang it as soon as I can find just the right place." (Implies future action without commitment, could be false intention.)
  - Option III (Clear, True Message): "It's just not my kind of painting. I don't like the colors, the style, or the subject." (Honest and direct, but potentially hurtful.)
  - Option IV (Clear, False Message): "What a beautiful painting! I love it." (A direct lie.)
Hinting: Communication that aims to save the receiver from embarrassment by indirectly conveying a message, allowing them to interpret and respond subtly.

The Ethics of Evasion

When considering alternatives to self-disclosure like lying or equivocation, it is important to reflect on the ethical implications:

Consider whether the effects of a lie will be worth the deception: Weigh the short-term benefits against potential long-term damage to trust or relationships.
Imagine how others would respond if they knew what you were really thinking or feeling: Would they accept your reasons for not telling the truth or for using evasion? This helps gauge the potential impact on your integrity and relationships.

Guidelines for Self-Disclosure

Before engaging in self-disclosure, consider the following:

Is the Other Person Important to You? Disclosure is typically more appropriate and beneficial in significant relationships.
Is the Risk of Disclosing Reasonable? Evaluate the potential negative consequences against the benefits.
Is the Self-Disclosure Appropriate? Consider the context, timing, and nature of the relationship.
Is the Disclosure Relevant to the Situation at Hand? Ensure the information contributes meaningfully to the interaction or relationship.
Is the Disclosure Reciprocated? Mutual disclosure often fosters trust and balance; one-sided disclosure can create imbalance.
Will the Effect Be Constructive? Aim for an outcome that strengthens the relationship or benefits those involved, rather than causing harm.