Romantic Relationships

What is the evolutionary approach for partner preference?

- argues males + females are subjected to different selective pressures which lead them to use different strategies to maximise reproductive potential

What does sexual selection involve?

* involves natural selection of characteristics increasing chances of success

\- (child bearing hips, muscles, larger eyes + facial hair)


* reproductive success involves production of healthy offspring, surviving to sexual maturity + then reproducing themselves

\- leads to different sexual behaviours due to anisogamy

What is anisogamy?

- difference in number of gametes (sperm + eggs) being produced

What is inter sexual selection?

- members of one sex evolve preferences for desirable qualities in potential mates
- those who possess these characteristics (attractiveness, status + resources) will gain mating advantage over those who don't
- preferences of one sex determine areas in which other sex must compete

What is intra sexual selection?

* where one sex must outcompete other members in order to gain access to opposite sex
* animals do this through fighting to harm not kill
* humans do this through fighting or luxury items to show wealth
* successful individuals able to mate + pass on their genes → individuals who have successful characteristics (greater size or strength) become more widespread in gene pool

Why is being choosy important for long term partners?

- important for women in particular due to anisogamy
- women have less sex cells + have to be more picky over who they choose as will have to raise child

What was the aim of Buss' evolutionary explanation study?

- to find out what males + females look for in long term partners

What was the method of Buss' evolutionary explanation study?

- asked over 10,000 people from 37 cultures (cross cultural validity) rate 18 characteristics on how important they would be in choosing a mate

What were the findings of Buss' evolutionary explanation study?

- resources -> women desired me with good financial prospects
- physical attractiveness -> men placed more importance on attractiveness of women
- youth -> men universally wanted women who were younger

What is an alpha bias?

- exaggerating the differences between men and women

What are the three factors / theories affecting attraction?

* self disclosure
* physical attraction (link to evolutionary)
* filter theory (social demography)

What is self disclosure?

- giving information about yourself to another individual
- person reveals intimate personal information (thoughts, feelings + experiences)

Why is self disclosure important?

- greater disclosure leads to greater feelings of intimacy
- people tend to prefer those who disclose intimate details to those who disclose less
- more you like a person the more you disclose to them + you like people who have revealed intimate information about themselves

What is social penetration theory?

- gradually revealing information, emotions + experience about yourself
- reciprocal sharing leads to greater understanding + trust

What is reciprocal sharing?

- belief that if we share something about ourselves we expect someone to return with a piece of information in similar weight

What is breadth and depth in social penetration theory?

* uses onion metaphor to describe self disclosure
* at first people share lots of information about certain aspects of themselves (depth) but consider some topics off limits (breadth)

\- trust builds in partners understanding breadth + depth increases

What are some examples of breadth and depth?

* at first people disclose superficial details about themselves (music taste, hobbies + interests)

→ then gradually moves on to more intimate details (religious, political beliefs, family values + difficult experiences)

What is breadth in social penetration theory?

- range of topics (more intimate details)

What is depth in social penetration theory?

- number of things you discuss

Who conducted the self disclosure research?

- Sprecher et al (2013)

What was the aim of the self disclosure research?

- interested in whether reciprocal self disclosure was more influential in attraction than one side self disclosure

Who were the participants of the self disclosure research and how were they paired?

- 156 undergraduate students from US university who were paired together
- 2/3rds were female female + 1/3 male female

What was the procedure of the self disclosure research?

- both dyad (part) did not know each other well + asked to complete self disclosure task over Skype
- reciprocal condition -> dyad members immediately took turns in asking questions + disclosing
- non reciprocal condition -> one person asked questions in first interaction while other self disclosed then swapped role
- after each interaction researchers assessed liking, closeness, perceived similarity + enjoyment

What were the findings of the self disclosure research?

- individuals in reciprocal condition reported more liking, closeness, perceived similarity + enjoyment of interactions than those in non reciprocal groups

What did the self disclosure research show?

- shows that reciprocal sharing led to greater feelings of attractiveness to other person
- in particular turn taking is important feature of reciprocal sharing + more likely to lead to positive interpersonal outcomes

What is the theory of physical attraction?

- number of desirable physical characteristics a person has
- men + women look for different physical qualities which give indication of person's chance of successful reproduction

What are the desirable physical characteristics for women?

- baby like eyes
- large hips
- small button nose
- slimness
- lustrous hair

What are the desirable physical characteristics for men?

- facial hair
- muscularity

What are the desirable physical characteristics for both sexes?

- facial symmetry

What does baby like eyes say about a person's chance of successful reproduction?

- healthy, young + fertile

What does large hips say about a person's chance of successful reproduction?

- able to birth child safely / offspring + mother will survive + bring them up
- (hip to waist ratio)

What does a small button nose say about a person's chance of successful reproduction?

- youth / fertility

What does slimness say about a person's chance of successful reproduction?

- healthy body

What does lustrous hair say about a person's chance of successful reproduction?

- healthy

What does facial hair say about a person's chance of successful reproduction?

- old enough to reproduce

What does muscularity say about a person's chance of successful reproduction?

- able to protect offspring / strong offspring to protect themselves

What does facial symmetry say about a person's chance of successful reproduction?

- no genetic problems

Why is physical attractiveness important to men?

- need to know women are old enough + yet still young enough to have child
- need to know that women will survive child birth + raise their child -> pass on genes

Why is physical attractiveness important to women?

- child birth risky + can result in death therefore women need to know genes being passed on to their child are ones that will help them survive
- children also don't have great immune systems + are not risk adverse -> need good set of genes to help protect them from death

What is the definition of the halo effect?

- individuals seen as physically attractive tend to create a favourable impression of pressing desirable personality characteristics (trustworthy, sociable + optimistic)
- example of self fulfilling prophecy

Who conducted the halo effect study?

- Dion et al

What was the procedure of the halo effect study?

- Dion et al asked women to read reports of severe classroom disruptions by elementary school children
- in some cases report was accompanied by photograph of very attractive child whilst other times was accompanied by picture of unattractive child (independent groups)
- had to decide what punishment they would give child

What were the results of the halo effect study?

- attractive children were excused from behaviour where as unattractive children were blamed + seen as "brats"

What is the definition of the matching hypothesis?

- those who are of similar level of physical attractiveness to each other are more likely to form romantic relationships

How does the matching hypothesis work?

- when choosing partner an individual will assess own value in order to identify value of potential suitor
- may be initially attracted to people who are most socially desirable we often opt for people are similar level of attractiveness to ourselves in order to maximise successful outcome chances
- (partner doesn't run off with someone more attractive)

What is the filter theory?

- suggests we choose romantic partners based on series of filters that narrow down field of partners to make a choice from

What does Kerchoff and Davis suggest about filter theory?

- different filters are prominent at different stages of a relationship

What is the order for filter theory?

* social demography
* similarity in attitude
* complementary

What is the social demography filter?

* factors that lead to potential partners in first place
* how close you are to someone geographically (meeting someone close to you) or level of education (someone going to same school)

\- other factors -> social, religion + ethnic group
* the outcome is homogamy

What is homogamy?

- idea you are more likely to form a relationship with someone who is socially or culturally similar to you

What is the similarity in attitude filter?

* identifying people with similar values + beliefs
* traits important in first 18 months of relationship
* encourages deeper communication + self disclosure (wanting children or political beliefs)

What is the complementary filter?

* people who have different needs like each other as provide each other with mutual satisfaction of opposite needs

\- (one likes to cook the other doesn't)
* found trait was more important than others + made them feel whole

What are the maintenance theories?

* filter theory (similarity in attitude + complementary)
* social exchange theory
* equity theory
* investment model

What are the economic models of relationships?

* social exchange theory
* equity theory
* investment model

What is social exchange theory (SET)?

- suggests both partners must perceive they are continually giving + receiving items of value to + from one another
- relationships fundamentally selfish they only continue if both members feel they are getting something out of it

What are some examples of profits?

- trust
- happiness
- money
- comfort
- love
- sex
- pets

What are some examples of costs?

- money
- time
- effort
- arguments

What are the two ways profit is measured in a relationship?

- comparison level (CL)
- comparison level for alternative (CLalt)

What is the comparison level (CL)?

* how much reward you believe you deserve
* based on self esteem

\- also learnt through social norms found on social media, TV, films etc
* someone who has had very poor relationship will have low comparison level → likely to expect less from another relationship


* higher degree of happiness if both partners outcomes / perceived profits are above comparison levels

What is the comparison level for alternatives (CLalt)?

* have to decide if could gain greater rewards + fewer costs elsewhere
* only stay in relationship if believe it is more rewarding than alternatives
* Duck (1994) suggests take “there are plenty more fish in the sea” unless we are satisfied then don’t tend to notice other options
* more rewarding partner’s alternatives the less stable relationship becomes

\- dependence will decrease → may cause conflict if showing different levels of dependence

What is equity theory?

* based on idea of perceived fairness
* claims people are most comfortable when what they get out of a relationship (benefits) is roughly equal to what they put in (costs)

What is the difference between equity and equality?

* equity is perceived fairness within a relationship with a high perception leading to maintenance
* equality is how equal profits + costs are (not important for maintenance)

How is a relationship maintained through equity theory?

* occurs through balance + stability
* relationship = inequitable you must recognise inequity + change it
* greater inequity more effort put into realign balance as long as is perceived to be viable / possible

How do people who are over benefiting from a relationship feel?

* guilty

How do people who are under benefiting from a relationship feel?

* angry

According to Hatfield and Rapson (2011), what are the three ways a couple can restore equity?

* restoration of actual equity
* restoration of psychological equity
* leaving the relationship

What is the restoration of actual equity?

* volunteering to make things equal or asking partner to do so

What is the restoration of psychological equity?

* couple distort reality + convince themselves that it is perfectly fair the way they are

What is leaving the relationship in terms of equity theory?

* can be physically (divorce) or emotionally (no longer have feelings for partner)

What is the procedure of Stafford and Canary (2006)’s equity study?

* asked 200 married couples to complete several measures of equity + relationship satisfaction

\- relationship maintenance tasks (emphasising affection + commitment), sharing tasks (housework) + positivity (upbeat optimistic communication)

\- also included questionnaires

What are the findings of Stafford and Canary (2006)’s equity study?

* satisfaction highest for spouses who perceived relationship to be equitable followed by over benefiting partners then under benefiting
* spouses treated equitably tended to be happier + more likely to engage in behaviours contributing to spouse’s happiness

What are the methodological problems with Stafford and Canary (2006)’s equity study?

* asked to complete questionnaire → may lead to social desirability bias as want relationship to be perceived as good

\- (reduces validity)

Why was the investment model developed?

* understand why people persist in some romantic relationships + not others

What does the investment model suggest?

* relationships are maintained when both couples feels satisfied, is high investment size + low comparison with alternatives

What are the three parts of the investment model?

* comparison level for alternatives
* satisfaction levels
* investment size

What is comparison level for alternatives in the investment model?

* individuals assessment of whether their needs might be fulfilled by someone else than current partner
* higher comparison for alternatives the lower level of commitment but if no other options person may stay

What are satisfaction levels in the investment model?

* measure of degree to which current partner gratifies person’s important needs
* positive + negative emotions in relationship influenced by extent partner fulfils them

\- example → fulfilled by amount compliments received
* higher satisfaction level higher the commitment

What is investment size in the investment model?

* measure of all resources attached to relationships which would be lost if relationship was to end

\- examples → finances, children, house etc
* investments made that increase with length of time couple is together

\- made expecting long future together
* as result investments create powerful psychological inducement to persist with relationship
* higher investment size higher level of commitment

Who came up with the phase model for when relationship breakdown?

* Duck (1982)

What are the four stages to a relationship breaking down according to Duck’s model?

* intrapsychic phase
* dyadic phase
* social phase
* grave dressing stage

How does the intrapsychic phase start?

* person admit they are dissatisfied with relationship + spent lot of time thinking about why unhappy + possible ways forward

What are the features of the intrapsychic phase?

* focuses on internal thoughts about dissatisfaction
* has not discussed dissolution (unhappiness) with partner

\- may express in different ways (social withdrawal) until decision is made

What is the threshold of thinking for the intrapsychic phase?

* “I can’t stand this anymore”

How does the dyadic phase start?

* person confronts partner about dissatisfaction

What are the features of the dyadic phase?

* person spends lots of time highlighting issues (including lack of commitment)

\- feelings of anger + guilt aired
* couples become aware of potential forces keeping them together (children, shared ownership of house / pet) → costs of breaking up

\- relationship can be saved if try to work out issues

What is the threshold of the dyadic phase?

* “I’d be justified in withdrawing”

How does the social phase start?

* couple make disagreement public to friends + family

What are the features of the social phase?

* family + friends get involved by giving advice + taking sides
* may cause anxiety + stress as cannot deny problem

\- (hard to mend relationship at this stage)
* lead to more unhappiness as person realises they are not getting most out of relationship

\- relationship may end

What is the threshold for the social phase?

* “I mean it”

What are the features of the grave dressing stage?

* both sides formulate version of why relationship broke down
* minimise own faults + maximises partners

\- protects ego + look good to potential new partners by seeming loyal + trustworthy
* sees initially attached to feature rebellious → irresponsible

What is the threshold of the grave dressing stage?

* “It’s time to start a new life”

What is Duck and Rollie (2006)’s suggested extension to the Duck’s model?

* resurrection phase
* stage where people move beyond pain + distress after ending the relationship + experience personal growth

What are virtual relationships?

* any relationships that are conducted on the internet rather than face to face

What are the two opposing theories for online relationships?

* reduced cues theory
* hyperpersonal model (with absence of gating)

What is the reduced cues theory?

* suggests online relationships are less effective than in person relationships due to lack of non verbal cues
* not able to communicate all feelings without non verbal cues → become deindividuated → loose inhibitions
* problem as people tend to be blunter + say things wouldn't normally say

\- feeling less connected to people online + don’t self disclose

What is a non verbal cue?

* process of sending information through ways that so not require use of language (smiling)

What is the hyperpersonal model?

* online relationships effective for increasing self disclosure → forming relationships
* due to self disclosure happening very quickly in online relationships because of anonymity

\- can share intimate details as person doesn’t know who they are or context so information can be kept secret

What did Walther argue about the hyperpersonal model?

* relationships should be more intense + intimate + self disclosure occur quicker than FtF

What is Cooper and Sportolari (1997)’s boom and bust phenomena as part of the hyperpersonal model?

* relationships start quickly with high levels of self disclosure + end quicker as need for self disclosure has disappeared as have shared everything they need to
* exciting as can share anything due to anonymity but then need to share is lost
* not full trust as could be anyone → realises relationship not going anywhere so ends

What is a gate in terms of the hyperpersonal model?

* any obstacle to formation of a relationship